Wedding Week

It is now officially wedding week!

Yesterday on my #coffeeneuring trip (more on that later) I rode by the ceremony site and it looked beautiful!

I successfully obtained the marriage license on Friday and got post-cards which they are using in place of a guest book.  I checked the White House Gift Shop for postcards because I thought they might have some really cool ones.

They did not.  Especially not for $1 or $2 apiece.  I continued down 15th Street and perused the gift shop truck vendors until I found one that had a good variety and then bought the postcards I needed for 25 cents apiece.

The only crisis still currently waiting to be solved is to get Mergsie’s pants (that will make sense later, promise) fixed.  Hopefully that will be accomplished by my tailor first thing on Friday morning.

It’s possible and probably likely that some other crisis will arise this week, but I think we have enough of the prep done that we can handle it.

I’m getting excited!

Sisters Weekend – A Success

Sisters Weekend was a rousing success.

Unfortunately, it completely kicked my butt and I was in bed by 9 every night this week.

We started the weekend off with brunch with a detour that routed a major road through the airport which resulted in the 9 minute drive home from the airport taking 40 minutes with 31 minutes of that being a crawl just to exit the airport, and a police officer dressed in gray and black with no car, no reflectors, no cones, nothing yelling at me when an SUV cut me off.  I crawled to the turn lane, when I finally reached it I signaled and then passed the 3-4 cars ahead of me.  The SUV up ahead at the point where the two lanes broke apart abruptly pulled in front of me and cut me off.  I blew my horn (it’s a reflex).  A police officer standing in the straight lane on the passenger side of that SUV yelled at me “that’s what you get for not waiting.”

Umm… What?  What the freak man?  For waiting until I reached the turn lane (as opposed to driving up the left shoulder which admittedly I considered), signaling, and knowing where I want to go (which is not the same way as this bumper to bumper crawl) I “get” cut off and almost hit???  Seriously?  I don’t mean to be disrespectful (okay fine. I kind of do.) but who the heck stands on the passenger side of the road in black and gray with no vehicle with flashing lights, no reflectors, no cones, no flares, nothing except a flashlight in her hand?  That’s the dumbest move I ever saw.  I wanted to call and complain but it was so dark I have no idea which agency she is even employed by.

The Bride

But… once we finally got back we crashed and then officially started the weekend off with a delicious brunch!  It felt wonderful to all be gathered together in the kitchen chatting around the island.

We had an awesome day hanging out, we ate tons of delicious food, and watched the Mets win.  There is something infinitely better about watching a game in a house with a group of people who are screaming and cheering just as loudly as I am compared to watching it by myself in my apartment and mentally apologizing to my neighbors.

The next day we got a couple of wedding to-dos crossed off the list, had lunch with my parents, and watched Furious 7 while munching on cheesecake and chocolate chip pie.

Mergsie and I got up at 4 though for her to catch her flight home and I headed straight in to the office.

I spent the rest of this week exhausted by 8 pm but it was worth it!

Sisters Weekend

This weekend is “Sisters Weekend”!!!  I’ve been looking forward to it since about July when we planned it.

I think in the last two years all my sisters and I have only been together three weekends.  Since July 2011 at least one sister has been living out of the country until July of this year.  And not the same sister, but 3/5.  They have inadvertently taken turns living overseas which has meant that every holiday has had a sister missing.

July 2014 we were all together for a long weekend.  Everyone is currently back in the States and one sister is getting married; the one I affectionately refer to as Dr. Mergalicious.

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It’s super weird that she is getting married.  It’s even weirder that she is marrying someone who is approximately the opposite of every single other guy she has dated.  But he’s also the first guy she has dated who I have liked.  And he’s just right for her.

She has this weekend off and our sister who is in college has fall break so we decided to make this weekend Mergsie’s “bachelorette party” ish.   Ish because our youngest two sisters (the babies) are 12 and 14 so there won’t be any clubs or plastic penis decorations.    Which is better anyways.

After we planned for this to be “Sisters Weekend” we realized that our parents will be out-of-town for the weekend at a conference.  So it truly will be just the sisters.

I’m so pumped!!!  I’m waiting to head to the airport and then tomorrow morning it officially starts with brunch including waffles and mimosas (not for the babies).  That will be followed by an all day movie marathon of the Fast & Furious movies with snacks of course.  Then we have shrimp or beef tacos for dinner with avocado lime sauce and honey jalapeno margaritas (Cokes for the babies) and cheesecake and chocolate chip pie for dessert!

Sunday we have to find Mergsie shoes for the wedding and make the place cards for the reception.  It should be pretty awesome.

Monday Mantra & Some Random Thoughts

No cool graphic this week.  We’re keeping things basic. 

Monday Mantra:

Stay the course. 

That is all.  That’s the important thing to focus on right now. 

Now for some other thoughts:

– I have a love-hate relationship with owning a car.  I have at various times tried to convince Homie to sell our car.  Recently I’ve  been off that kick and on an appreciation kick.  I have a nice car.  I have a comfortable car.  I have a safe car.  There is something phenomenally luxurious about sitting on your butt in the car letting it do all the work after biking.  But I found out on Saturday that it has some significant rust and technically needs a $900 repair. Ugh. Eff cars. Eff snow and rust and GMs crappy inability to make cars for the Northeast. 

– My peace lily from my cousin’s funeral has bloomed like crazy the past two weeks. That makes me happy. 

  
– My cousin just got out of the hospital.  He’s been there since July.  I face timed with him a few weeks ago and he looked about like I expected.  A few days after we talked he had a feeding tube put in.  I saw a picture of him yesterday and he looks horrible.  He’s even thinner than a few weeks ago and my uncle shaved his head because he had lost so much of his hair from chemo.   His mom is parading him around like a trophy.  It makes me sick to my stomach to see.  It’s awful.  Seeing him like that yesterday made me doubt my  “I’m not going to borrow trouble, technically his chances of survival are about 50/50 right now. Maybe 60/40 but those are still good odds” mentality.

– My other cousin was telling me about a conversation with her boss.  She let her boss know about our cousin J in case she needs to take time off.  She told her boss that she’ll be fine, she just needs to go home to be there for the rest of the family and her brother.  She said “I’ll probably cry for a day and then I’ll be fine and then I’ll take a week or two to make sure everyone else is okay.”  And I wasn’t upset with her for thinking that but I realized how little she is prepared for this.  I think it will be much worse for her than just a day of crying.  But she’s never lost anyone close to her before.  

– I’ve had trouble sleeping through the night for the last 5-6 years at least with other periods for as long as I can remember.  It’s annoying. It has gotten really bad recently.  Last week I tried a couple of things and had 3 or 4 nights where I slept through the night.  It was amazing!  This morning I woke up at 4 and never fully fell back to sleep.  Lame. 

– I’m glad I have a husband who is totally accepting of the fact that my schedule for the entire week revolves around the fact that Georgia has a big game on Saturday and I wil do nothing except watch the pre-game, game, and post-game coverage all day. 

– I’ve been on a purging kick in our apartment.  I suck at managing stuff and I don’t enjoy it.  So I’m just getting rid of it.  Homie has been inspired and after a week of sorting we donated 3 bags of clothes, 3 bags of household items, and over 200 books.  

Complicated Feelings on My Birthday

I was supposed to be born in September.  I was a little late (maybe more than a little) and since it was the hottest summer on record my mom is still a bit perturbed about that.

I used to celebrate my birthday countdown from my due date until my actual birth date every year.

Then my cousin died the day before my countdown always begins.  That year I wanted nothing more than to completely ignore my birthday.

There was (and still is) something incredibly painful about knowing that my cousin who is (I want to say “was” because that’s correct, but I can’t actually bring myself to) seven years younger than me will never have another birthday.  His body is lying in the ground in a beautiful well-kept cemetery.  He’ll never grow up.  He’ll never have another birthday.  He’ll never graduate high school or go to college or attend medical school like he planned.  His brother will be an only child for the rest of his life.  We’ll never get together as adults.  We’ll never have a closer relationship than what we had at that moment, because he’s gone.

I think it makes it more complicated because his birthday is in October as well.  My dad is one of three and he and each of his siblings had their firstborn children all in October.  My grandma always made a big deal for each of us about how as the oldest in our respective families we share a birth month.  It was like a special club just for the three of us.

When I think of my birthday, all of that is tied in to my thoughts as well.  I can’t separate it completely.  The year my cousin died I wanted nothing more than for time to tick as far away from the day of his death as possible and I wanted to skip October.  I just wanted all the reminders to be past us as fast as possible.

My family made me celebrate but my heart wasn’t in it.  I went to lunch with a couple of my sisters and my mom and took a nap.  Then I called my favorite aunt and talked to her for a few hours on the phone.

Last year I wanted to shake off all the memories tied to my birthday.  I wanted to do something so big that I couldn’t help but be distracted.  I hated those days between my cousin’s death and my actual birthday.  Instead of a countdown from when I was supposed to be born until I was actually born it felt like I was counting the days since the anniversary of his death.

I had to work on my actual birthday and I was sick, but the weekend after Homie had an amazing trip planned for me.  It was the best.

This year I have been doing much better.  I want to have my birthday countdown.  I just have to get through the day before…

A Hard Week

This week has been a hard week.  Last week was a little bit harder than I thought it would be as well.

The second anniversary of my cousin’s death is Saturday.  It somehow simultaneously feels like it just happened yesterday and I can’t believe that he’s gone and I sort of half expect to see him again and also like it happened forever ago.

It feels like this year the anniversary is harder than last year.

Monday I felt horrible all day.  I felt physically sick and just wanted to leave work and come home.  I had a horrible headache, I think from the rain, I had a sore throat, and my whole body ached.  I couldn’t leave work though until I talked with someone regarding problems with my software on my computer.  I had a can of soup in my desk and I decided to have that for lunch, but with it I just wanted a grilled cheese sandwich.

Soup and a grilled cheese is the ultimate comfort food for a rainy day when you are also sick.  I went to the grocery store near my office planning to buy some bread and cheese.  I knew that at this store the cheese would be outrageously expensive but I didn’t care.  The store didn’t sell one single cheese without cow’s milk.  No goat cheese, no sheep cheese, nothing, so no sandwich.

By the time I came home I just wanted normal.

Homie tried to be helpful and take over dinner.  I felt like a terrible person, but all I wanted was for him to get the freak out of my kitchen and stop interrupting my normal evening routine and go back to his.  I always get home before him, I unwind, then I start dinner and it’s usually pretty close to being ready by the time he gets home.  Or I get home, unwind, do something, then when he arrives home I start cooking and while he unpacks his bag, showers, etc I finish dinner.

But on Monday he got home before me, went for a run, pulled out a recipe, and then when he came back was chatting and discussing dinner options.  All I wanted was to quietly go through my normal routine.

This week being the anniversary of one cousin’s death while another cousin is still in the hospital with cancer nearly 3 months after being diagnosed is too much.